


Closing Distance

by xanderbot13



Series: Photographic Memories [1]
Category: NieR: Automata (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Not smut but it gets a bit steamy towards the end, Post-Ending E (NieR: Automata), Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-02
Updated: 2018-08-20
Packaged: 2019-06-20 08:57:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15530751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xanderbot13/pseuds/xanderbot13
Summary: "2B and I...we’ve grown a lot closer. Closer than we’ve ever been. But still, there are some things we've left unsaid. Things we refuse to talk about. Our pasts come to haunt us in the form of horrible nightmares. I still feel like I don’t know anything about her, and she refuses to speak about any of the stuff that happened between me and her in the past. I need to know...who were we? Who was I? I need to see for myself. I need those memories back. It's okay now. We can laugh. We can love. We have nothing to fear anymore, 2B...won’t you tell me the truth this time?"(Ties in with the canon novellas, Memory Cage and Memory Thorn, so reading them before is recommended)





	1. Reoccurring Nightmares

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, I’m Xander, I’m kinda new to this fandom. This story is a prologue to a series of short stories about their moments together before the game. Enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I’m Xander, I’m kinda new to this fandom. This story is a prologue to a series of short stories about their moments together before the game. Enjoy!

I jolted awake at the sound of my name in the form of a deafening cry. I sat up straight and looked to my left, checked to see if she had been hurt and wildly looked around in case we were under attack. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, except for 2B, who was still squirming and crying in her sleep. I put my hand on her shoulder and shook her gently.

"2B, wake up!" I muttered, "2B, it's okay, it's okay, wake up, pleaaase," I kept shaking her, desperately trying to get her out of wherever her subconscious mind had taken and make her come back to reality. Her eyes flew open and she gasped loudly. Sobs still escaped her trembling lips as she looked up at me.

 "N…nines…" she sobbed and without a warning, threw her arms around me, pulling me into a constricting embrace. Despite the slight discomfort, I returned the gesture gently and rubbed her back soothingly.

 "Hey, it's okay…it's okay, 2B. Everything's fine. Shhh…it's okay, I got you. I got you…" I muttered softly in her ear, trying to calm her down.

 "No, It's NOT fine!" She cried, the sound muffled by my shirt. "I….y-you were...ghh..I'm sorry..." she kept crying into my chest, failing to form a coherent sentence, but I understood. 

 I laid back down, pulling her closer to me, and continued to rub her back and stroke her hair softly as I worked up the courage to ask.

 "Bad memories again...?” It was a vague question, but it was as explicit as I could get. This was, after all, a very delicate topic. For both of us.

 Her breath hitched in her throat and she squeezed me a bit tighter, nodding slowly.

Something inside me crumbled. This was the 13th time in three months. The first time was the scariest of all -I remember thinking that she had been infected with a virus or been attacked and injured. It was during our first week at the Resistance Camp, when we first moved in. Officially, that is, since we had nowhere else to go. We still slept in our own separate beds, but after that time, she insisted that I stay with her from then on. Since then, my old bed lies neglected in the far corner on the other side of the room. It was odd seeing this fragile side of her. It was as if she was a totally different person. Back when we were with YoRHa, I never saw her cry. Not once. Not even when she got severely injured. I was so used to her strong, resilient, indomitable persona, that it was shocking to see her crumble like that, right before my eyes. I felt powerless. It felt horrible...not being able to do anything to help her, even with my lame attempts at comforting her. In battle, I could provide support. When she got hurt, I’d hurry and provide first-aid. If she needed maintenance, she could always count on me. But her damaged psyche...the panic attacks...the flashbacks, the nightmares...I was at a loss here. I had those too, and I didn’t even know how to deal with them myself. I’ve never told her about them though. She’s dealing with enough already. However...she never really tells me anything either. She always keeps quiet about these things. 

 “...What happened?” I whispered hesitantly.

It was a question I asked every time. I just...I needed to know. It had been me there and then after all. At least...a past me. Was he even _me_ though? Was he any different than I was? Did we even have anything in common, other than a number and designation? Or were we still the same person, just with different experiences? Did he love her, like I did? Was I good to her?

 All my questions were futile, however.

 She just shook her head in reply.

 I pouted slightly and buried my face in her hair. “Please?” _Tell me..._

 She shook her head again and choked back a sob.

 “Okay, okay...” I sighed in defeat and kissed the top of her head. “2B, look at me,” I slipped my hand beneath her chin and guided her face out of her hiding place on my chest. “C’mon now, open your eyes. I’m right here, see? I’m not going anywhere,” I said.

Slowly, she opened her eyes and peered up at me with the expression of a frightened kitten.

I offered her a small smile and pressed my forehead against hers. “It’s over now, 2B. You’re safe. I’m safe. We’re both fine, and we’re alive, and we’re here together. Please, don’t worry anymore, it’s all ov-”

 “But-“

 “Sssh, listen to me,” I gently pressed my index finger to her lips. “We’re okay now, 2B. And I’ll always be here, and take care of you, as you take care of me. Everything will be alright, the war is over. All that we went through is over-”

 “But even if it’s over, these memories _still_ haunt me, just like they did before and just like they always have and they won't go away no matter how hard I try!” She cried, pushing my hand away.

I flinched back at her sudden outburst.

“ _Even now_ , I still feel like I’m stuck in that horrible cycle! It’s as if it wasn’t even over AT ALL! It’s as if this is all just a crazy dream I’m having about a beautiful future where we can finally live in peace together and I’m _SO afraid_ I’ll wake up one day and it’ll all have been a _lie_ and I’ll have to go back to being a _vile, filthy, treacherous murderer_ and I’ll have to make you suffer over and over and over and over and-”

 “ _2B snap out of it!_ Just listen to yourself, you're not making sense!” I snapped. She immediately flinched away from me and covered her face with her hands.

_FUCK_. 

 “I’m sorry...” she whimpered. “I’m sorryI’msorryI’msorryI’msorry, _I’m so sorry, Nines_...I’m sorry,” She kept crying and apologizing over and over.

 _Man, I’m such a fuck up._  I bit my lip and squeezed my eyes shut. I really wanted to kick myself for raising my voice at her. I was so frustrated, I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t know how to help, and quite honestly, being woken up in the middle of my sleep night after night was quite exhausting, but this was 2B. She was way more important than all of this, and somehow, I needed to make everything alright for her again. If my pain was unbearable, I couldn’t even begin to imagine what she was feeling.

 I slowly reached out to her and stroked her hair gently. “2B, shhh, it’s okay, it’s okay, _please_ don’t apologize. I shouldn’t have yelled, that was really really stupid, _I’m_ sorry,” I muttered, trying to soothe her, but she wouldn't listen.

 “W-what..I..did...was _unforgivable_...I..can..n-never be forgiven. Ever... _ever_...ghhh...hhh...I’m sorry...I’m so sorryyy...hahhh... _I should’ve stayed dead_...”

 My eyes went wide as I gasped and forced her hands away from her face, “Don’t. Don’t _ever_ say that again,” my voice broke mid-sentence as tears threatened to spill out of my eyes. I closed my eyes and brought her hands up to my lips and kissed them incessantly, wanting to erase from my mind what she just said and all the unwanted images that came flooding in with it. A familiar intrusive thought sneaked into my mind, making me pause and check for something for the umpteenth time. I snaked my hand under her shirt and pressed it to her abdomen, then slid it around to check her backside. Feeling her warm, soft skin beneath my hand brought me comfort. I knew it made no sense, I knew she was fine, she was breathing, she was alive, but I just had to check. Just to be 100% sure. I sighed in relief as I pulled my hand back out and pulled her shirt down. She was trembling, so I kept my hand on her lower back and carefully pulled her close to me.

 “I’m sorry...” she whispered meekly.

 I leaned in closer and kissed her lips delicately, before snaking my other arm under her and pulling her back into my arms in a tight embrace. “It’s alright, 2B...you know, none of this was ever your fault. The war, the machine network, YoRHa, all the lies, the things they put us through... _none_ of it was your fault. It was horrible and extremely unfair, but we never asked for any of it. So please, _please don’t blame yourself_. You’ve already suffered enough, you don’t have to keep suffering anymore," I paused and planted a soft kiss to her forehead. "I know it still hurts, and it’ll take some time for us to heal, But we’ll be okay. We’re free now. We can be happy,” I pressed another kiss to her forehead. “We’re still healing, but we’re okay. And the rest of our lives are going to be sooo much fun, and we’ll get to stay together, forever and ever. Okay?”

 She didn't respond at first, just kept crying quietly into my chest as I stroked her hair. “Okay,” she whispered back after a while, sounding a lot calmer now.

 I smiled softly. “I love you so much,” I whispered, giving her forehead a few more kisses before nuzzling against her hair affectionately.

 "I love you too,” she replied in a tiny voice and pressed herself closer, wrapping her arms around me again. She continued crying softly into my shirt, but she was finally calm. I just kept stroking her hair soothingly as I held her. After a while, her tears ceased and her breathing evened out as she fell asleep. By now my shirt was incredibly soaked, but I couldn’t care less. She was fine, and that’s all that mattered. I took one last look at her peaceful face before I closed my eyes and prayed that her nightmares or my own wouldn’t come back.

 

* * *

 

 I had a hard time falling back asleep, so I hadn’t slept very much by the time 153 beeped her alarm to wake us up.

 “Five more minutes,” I groaned and snuggled closer to 2B. She was still sound asleep, totally unperturbed by the alarm.

 “Negative: it is 7:00 a.m. The designated time to wake up,” 153 replied monotonously as she turned the alarm off and pulled the window blinds up. Bright light seeped in through the window, and suddenly, ‘night time’ was over.

 “Ughhh...pleaaase, pod. Haven’t slept at all, gimme a break, will you? 'Sides, I’m already awake," I yawned. "Just...need a moment longer. I’ll get ready in a bit. Promise...” I mumbled and pulled the covers up to my face.

 “Negative: it is 7:00 a.m. The designated time to wake-”

 I interrupted 153 by throwing a pillow at her and went back into our blanket cave.

 “...Affirmative. The need for ‘a moment longer’ sounds like a good idea,” she said as she floated back to her resting place on a shelf beside the still dormant 042. I sighed and went back to sleep.

 .

 .

 .

“...ns................ines..................Nines,” Soft lips pressed to mine as my consciousness came back online. Still, I didn’t move. Only smiled slightly. I heard a tiny giggle and felt her lips on mine again. “C’mon, I know you’re awake now,” she said, playfully pecking my lips over and over. Time for a surprise attack.

 I captured her lips with mine and wrapped my arms around her waist as I flipped us over, then continued peppering her entire face and neck with kisses. Her giggles filled the room, specially when I nibbled on a very sensitive part on the side of her neck.

 “Nines!” She squealed.

 I laughed softly and finally stopped the torture. “Good morning,” I smirked down at her.

 “Good morning,” she smiled playfully, reaching down to the sides of my ribs, and pressed her fingers down on the sensitive spots.

 I let out a less-than-masculine little scream and flinched away, trying to escape her mischievous hands to no avail.

 “Hahahaha stop, stop, pleaaase! Ahaha, stooop! You’re going to kill me! Hahaha,” I squirmed around until she abruptly stopped.

 “I’m sorry,” she blurted out and drew her hands back, suddenly looking downcast.

 _Wait, what? What did I-?_  

 “Wait, n-no! I-I’m sorry. I...shit. I should be more careful with my words...” I muttered and reached up to stroke her cheek. “2B...?”

 “Hm?”

 “Remember what I said last night,” I reminded her.

 “Yeah...yeah...” she sighed, still not meeting my eyes.

 “One affirmation will suffice,” I said in a teasing tone. She only chuckled dryly. I laid back down on the pillow, beside her. “Please look at me,” I whispered. Her eyes hesitantly looked up at mine and I leaned in to plant a firm kiss on her lips. “I love you,” I said, giving her a warm smile.

 “I love you too,” she grinned back softly, “to the moon and back...a million times over,” she sighed and delicately placed her hand on my cheek.

 “Two Beeeee,” my smile grew wider as I blushed. I couldn’t help but dive back in and attack her entire face with kisses again. She was just too cute. I kissed her until I got her giggling again. The best musical compositions in all of history could never compare to her laughter. 

 “Hahahaha, okay okay,” she pecked my lips, “C’mon now, we gotta get ready for the day, it’s already pretty late,” she said.

 I glanced at the clock on the wall and gasped. “7:56?! Shit, we’re supposed to meet up with Anemone at 8:00, let’s go!” I said as I jumped out of bed and rushed to freshen up and change into my work clothes. When we were done getting ready, we walked outside our room hand in hand and approached Anemone to get our instructions for the day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this first chapter, please leave a comment if you did! I’d appreciate your feedback very much :)


	2. Memories of Dust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT: I forgot to say it before, but if you haven't yet, please read the NieR novellas, specifically Memory Cage and Memory Thorn, before reading this, otherwise it'll be hard to understand why this was so significant. Enjoy!

 Today’s tasks should have been simple. There were some resources the Resistance Camp needed in order to fix their construction equipment, so they could then use those to start rebuilding the city. It was a bittersweet prospect. This was all ours now, after all...soon we would be living and working in those same buildings humans used to reside in. But, in order to get some of those resources, we had to go down to an old mining cave at the side of a cliff...in the desert. So here we were. In the middle of a sea of sand. Under the hot, blazing sun. What fun...

“Aw, man, just how far is this place?” I groaned as we walked towards our destination. “Agh! This stupid sand!” I sighed as I tried to shake it out of my boots, but it only kept slushing around, making me grow more irritated by the second.

“Just hold on a bit longer, we’ll get there soon,” 2B said. I couldn’t see her eyes at the moment, but she didn’t seem perturbed at all by the heat or the sand.

“How much longer is ‘soon,’ anyway?” 

“Stop complaining and keep moving, it won’t take too long, I promise," she turned and flashed a small smile. 

“Fiiine," I sighed.  

“Or would you like me to carry you? I wouldn’t mind,” she offered in teasing tone. 

“W-wha-?! I-I can walk on my own, thank you,” I blushed furiously, “I don’t need you to carry me around, I’m not a kid, you know,” I said, mentally thanking my dear visor for helping me hide my flustered state.

She chuckled softy. “Well then, in that case, keep up with me. We’re almost there,” she said.

I groaned and kept following close behind. She was right though, not five minutes later, the small opening at the side of the cliff came into view. Once inside, I let out a deep sigh. 

“Finally,” I said, stretching my arms. “Ah, it feels nice and cool in here. Much better than out there in the desert.”

“That I can agree on,” 2B replied as she kept walking down towards the tunnel ahead. Our pods lit the way down, which was longer than I had expected, but I wasn’t complaining. It was kind of fun being here.

“Pod, scan the area for the resources we need,” I said, sending her the data Anemone had provided. 

“Affirmative,” she began using her built in scanner to track the approximate locations of the minerals and metals we needed. Once located, we began gathering them up and stuffing them away. Meanwhile, we made some small talk to pass the time. I kind of ran out of things to blab about after a while, so I started whistling the tune of a song from a very old animated movie. It kind of reminded me of this cave we were in.

“What is that?” 2B asked. 

“What is what?” 

“That tune you were whistling,” she replied. 

“Oh, it’s a song from an old movie I watched some time ago. I found it lying around in the Amusement Park one time, so I extracted the data and downloaded the file into 153’s library. I think I still have it. Wanna watch it sometime?” 

“Yeah, I guess...what’s it about?”

“Oh, uh...it’s about a young girl who breaks into the house of 7 guys who live in the middle of a forest, and moves in with them and all the animals. Her stepmother, the queen, has a thing for a strange, body-less dude who lives inside her mirror, but he keeps telling her that the girl is prettier. So then, she devices an evil plan to kill her, and that’s why she has to escape and live in the forest. Apparently, the movie was based on an old classic fairytale. It’s a strange story, but...I swear it’s a lot more interesting than it sounds. It’s a fun movie, I think you’d like it, since you also like animals and stuff, and it has a happy ending. We could watch it when we get back, if you want,” I offered with a smile.

“Hmm...is it anything like that other one you showed me, about the sleeping princess?” 

“You mean, the one during which  _you_  fell asleep?” I teased.

She chuckled, “yeah, that one. Sorry about that, I was very tired that day.”

“It’s alright, we could finish watching it sometime,” I said. “Oh and yeah, it’s a bit similar. It was done by the same animation studio too. It was called Disney. I kind of like their films, they’re nice,” I smiled, picking up one of the last minerals. 

She sighed and paused for a second. “Yeah...I know...” she muttered in a barely audible voice. I wondered what made her react that way. Was it just me, or did she look sad all of a sudden? I let it slide for now, but kept an eye on her anyway as I continued talking. 

“I also really like the songs. They might be a little cheesy, but they’re catchy, and some can even be quite touching. Like the one in the Little Mermaid, you remember that one? Or like the one I sang to you a few nights ago,” I grinned. 

“I like that song. Specially when you sing it,” she smiled bashfully, picking up the last metal ore. Once done, she dusted off her hands and stretched her arms wide. “Alright, that should be enough. Let’s get going,” she said, already heading back to where we came from.  

“Wait, 2B! Can’t we at least explore the cave a little bit longer? C’mon, there’s still lots of ground we haven’t covered, and we probably won’t be back here any time soon. Besides, mapping out the area could provide us with some useful information, don’t you think?”  

She turned around and stared at me for a moment. 

“Pleaaase?” I grinned widely. 

She sighed and walked back towards me, “Alright. But let’s not take too long. Anemone is waiting.”

“Yeah, yeah,” I took her hand and sprinted further down into the tunnel, where it split in two. “Hmmm...let’s take the right side first, see where it goes,” I suggested and dragged her further in, where we found a chest with a single book inside titled  _Mining For Dummies_. “Man, humans were weird,” I snickered. After some time, we hit a dead end, so we went back and took the left tunnel. This one was at least twice as longer than the previous one and took wild turns all over, going deeper and deeper and deeper. Suddenly, we got to a part of the tunnel where the floor was no longer just soil, but it was entirely made of stone. Even the walls and ceiling.

“Whoa, check this out! Where do you think this leads to? It still looks like it’s a long way from here, but with our limited lighting, there’s no way of telling,” I said. 

“I don’t know. I guess we’ll find out when we get there,” she replied nonchalantly. 

I chuckled, “C’mon 2B, aren’t you excited? I’ve never seen such a wide tunnel before, and it’s structure could indicate that there might be some sort of building or maybe an ancient underground facility at the end. It’s kind of cool, don’t you think?” 

“Hmm...I guess it is interesting. I’m glad you’re having fun,” she said.

“Awww, but aren’t  _you_  having fun with me? If you’re bored, we could go back, I wouldn’t mind. Really,” I said, turning to look at her. 

“I _am_  having fun, Nines. Truly. I’m just happy to be with you, it doesn’t really matter what we’re doing,” she smiled softly. 

I grinned back at her and squeezed her hand, “Two Beeee,” I blushed softly and kissed her cheek. “I’m happy you’re with me too,” I said as I drew a bit closer to her.  

She squeezed my hand back and smiled as we kept walking. It didn’t take us long to get to the end of the tunnel, where there was spiral stairway.

I gasped in awe, “Let’s go, let’s go, c’mon!” I bolted up the stairs, taking three at a time, anxious to see what was up there. 

“Hey wait for me, at least!” 2B called from way behind me. Whoops...in all my haste, I accidentally let go of her hand.  

“Sorryyy!” I called out, but I was already at the top of the stairs. It led into a wide, dark room, so I broke into a run and explored every single corner with the help of 153. “2B, check this place out!” I said as she reached the top of the stairs. Though not as big as the rooms in the castle in the Forest Kingdom, the room was quite wide and spacious, and the two pillars on either side seemed to have intricate carvings on the stone, as well as the walls and some parts of the ceiling. “It’s ALL made of stone! And look, these carvings seem to have some kind of pattern. I wonder if it means something. These symbols here kind of resemble written words,” I said, pointing at them, “what do you think it means? Pod, do you have any information on this?” 

“Analyzing...Negative. No information found on the source. Hypothesis: this room was used as a place for small gatherings and sacred rituals, based on the appearance.”

“Huh, that’s interesting,” I said, looking around the room, noticing all the details. Both walls at the sides had large sliding doors, which led into other passages. The one on the left was wide open, but the other one was mostly closed, with just a tiny space between the two doors. I walked towards the closed doorway and inspected it’s structure.  

"How do you think this door opened and closed? I mean, this is stone, right? And look at how thick it is. There's no way an average human could've moved something this heavy,” I tried putting my fingers through the tiny opening and pushed, but to no avail. “Hm...Do you think there’s a power source for it somewhere?” I looked around and then peered inside. I didn’t catch sight of anything though, since it was all dark. 2B’s footsteps echoed around the room as she walked towards me and put her hand on my shoulder.  

“Maybe...we should check out the other side,” she said with slight hesitation.  

I raised my eyebrow and turned to her. “Sure,” I smiled and went with her into the other passage.  

This one had a long corridor with three other smaller rooms, and then a stairway at the end. I ran up the stairs and noticed there were some odd stains on them near the door leading into the room ahead. Dark, reddish brown was splashed all over, but it was long dry by the looks of it. It looked like someone had accidentally spilled oil all over the place and hadn’t bothered to clean up. There could’ve been a machine conflict here and maybe that’s what caused the mess. In any case, it didn’t hold my attention for more than 2 seconds before I moved on. I walked through the doors and went inside. I peered up at the ceiling before walking around the room, moving my eyes toward the walls next as I went. My footsteps echoed throughout the room as I continuously stopped to investigate the stones paving the floor below.  

"The floors, the wall, even the ceiling — everything's made out of stone here too. It’s fascinating, don’t you think? They cut out huge slabs of it, arranged them, and lined them up accordingly... It's totally unlike any architectural styles I've seen before... What kind of machinery did they use? How did they manage to transport all of this stone? And how is this single pillar managing to maintain the whole thing intact?" I couldn’t help but speak with a bit of excitement as I ran up to a portion of the wall. "I think they might've used this area for lighting. On this elongated stand, here."

"Affirmative: There are traces which indicate a light fixture known as a "torch" may have been placed there."

"One, two, three, four ... There's eight of them in all. I wonder what this room was used for. There aren't any signs of it being used for rituals or anything,” I said. Once I was done looking around, I made my way to the half opened door on the other side. Outside, a little further ahead, there was a descending staircase, but there was a huge stone blocking the way down. 

“Alert: Damage detected in the floor and staircase ahead.”

I laughed, “I know that even without your warning. Right, 2B?” I turned to look at her, but she wasn’t there. “2B?!” I called, and ran back into the previous room just to find her still standing at the stairs, as if hesitating to go up. “Hey, I thought you were following me. Is something wrong?” I furrowed my brows in concern. 

She gasped and looked up at me. It's like she hadn't even noticed me approaching. It wasn't like her at all, something was up. Although I couldn’t see her eyes, I could see a hint of distress  in her expression. “I’m fine, let’s go,” she blurted out and swiftly ran up and out of the room.  

I followed closely behind and gently put my hand on her shoulder. “2B... if you’re not feeling well, we can go back now, it’s okay,” she was acting so odd... 

She shook her head. “It’s fine. Really. I just got a bit distracted,” she turned and smiled softly as she reached up to stroke my cheek.

I held her hand there with my own and kissed her palm. “Are you sure?” 

She nodded, but her smiled faltered.  _There’s something she isn’t telling me..._  

I sighed and looked at her intently. “Alright... if you say so. But if you wanna go, please tell me, okay?” 

She nodded, “okay.”

I smiled and went back to exploring. “So, anyway, check this thing out,” I said, pointing to the large rock a few feet in front of us and walking towards it. “It looks like it was a part of the ceiling. It’s a bit damaged, but you can still make out the patterns on it,” kneeling down, I took a closer look at the stone before turning my gaze upwards, noticing the dazzling blue sky above, peeking in from the hole in the ceiling. "I wonder what caused it to collapse like that."

"Analysis: The collapse appears to have occurred thousands of years ago. Therefore, it is impossible to identify the cause."

"Whoa, thousands of years, huh? That's amazing!" I exclaimed as I stood back up. 

"Heh...Amazing?" 2B muttered. 

"Yeah! I mean, if the ceiling here collapsed thousands of years ago, then that means this whole place must've been built much earlier than that. I can't believe it's in such good condition. Since the desert climate's harsh and- 2B? Hey, what’s wrong?” I asked as I turned around to face her and noticed she was shaking slightly. I walked up to her and put my hands on her shoulders. 

She just stood there, shaking and not saying a word. 

“2B, answer me, please. What’s going on? Please tell me what’s wrong,” I begged. She still didn’t respond, so I reached up and slid her visor off, automatically fearing the worst. I was relieved to see her bright blue eyes, however, her whole expression was full of fear. Even her lips were quivering. “2B, talk to me, please.” 

She shook her head slowly and wildly looked around the place, as if lost.  

"2B, please answer me. What's wrong?" I shook her shoulders slightly. 

“W hv t go...” she whispered unintelligibly. 

“What? What did you-?” 

“We have to go!” She snapped, taking my hand and breaking into a run.  

I gasped as I tried to keep up with her pace and figure out this whole puzzle in my head, but as we ran into the passage leading to the exit of this place, she tripped halfway through. We both tumbled to the ground, though she was quick to get back up. Before I knew what was happening, she had already picked me up into her arms and took off at an impossible speed into the expansive desert ahead. Too shocked to ask questions, I just held onto her as she sped through the sand. 

“Agh!” She shielded her eyes with one hand as enormous clouds of sand enveloped us.  

I held up her visor, which had been hanging from her neck, and helped her slide it back into place so she could see better through the sand. We both coughed up the tiny, annoying grains that snuck their way into our throats, but the sand storm didn’t stop her from running as we went around the hollow mountain we'd come out of and made our way back to the city ruins. Not once did she stop and take a break, she only kept going and going, ignoring my pleas to slow down and her pod’s warnings of highly accelerated pulse rate and dangerously high internal temperature. It seemed all this only made her run faster. I didn’t know what else to do, so I just tightened my grip around her and hoped she would be okay. 

___________________________________________________________

She collapsed on her knees when we finally reached the entrance of the city ruins, panting heavily. I grunted as I disentangled myself from her arms, but when I did, she completely dropped to the ground.  

“2B!” I kneeled down to turn her over on her back and checked her vitals. Her pulse rate was still quite high, although not dangerously so, but her internal temperature was over the roof. Her heat sinks weren’t helping much, if at all, and she was rapidly overheating. If I didn’t act quick, this could turn out to be fatal. “153! 042! Pass me our water flasks, quick!”  

“Affirmative,” they responded as they followed my order. 

I snatched the flasks from them and popped them open. “Here, drink,” I said, as I lifted her head up with one arm and held the flask to her lips. She took a few sips and slowly lifted her hand up to take the flask from me. As she drank, I slid her visor off and took the other flask. “I’m so sorry about this, it’s the only way I can bring your temperature down,” I said as I proceeded to douse her in water. She gasped and starting shivering violently. 

“Cold,” she whispered. 

“I know, I know, I’m sorry, but you’re burning up 2B,” I explained, continuing to pour the rest of the water onto her face and body. Once done, I checked her temperature again and saw that it was going down slowly, then let out a deep sigh of relief and waited for her to finish drinking her water. “Alright, let’s move you closer to the shade and see what’s up,” I gave the empty flasks back to our pods and grunted as I lifted her up to take her into the nearest building, where the air was cooler, and sat down against a pillar. Placing her between my legs, I propped her up against my chest so she could rest her back on me comfortably and lay her head on my shoulder. “Okay,” I sighed. “Just let me check your vitals and see if there’s anything that needs fixing, and then we’ll talk, alright?”  

She didn’t reply, but I took her little, shaky sigh as a yes, so I brought up my holoscreen and started checking her vitals again, making sure every little detail was in working order. Despite having over exerted herself, she was mostly fine. She was one of the strongest models after all. After a little tweaking here and there, I gave her a medium recovery patch and I was done. I sighed, putting my arms around her waist.

“How are you feeling now?” I asked after a moment. She was still quivering slightly. Her temperature had gone down to normal and all her vitals were green, so I figured it must be something else, most likely related to whatever triggered her strange reaction back at the temple-like place. 

“...Emotions...prohibited...” she whispered. 

I sighed and squeezed my eyes shut. “Not anymore 2B. YoRHa is gone. Please, tell me what’s wrong.” 

She shook her head. 

“Please...”  

She shook her head again. 

“Please...?” 

She kept shaking her head nervously.

“Damnit, why won’t you trust me? Even after all this time...” I grit my teeth. “How can I help you if you won’t let me? Tell me, what am I supposed to do, 2B? Because I don’t know anymore,” I said, choking back a sob. 

She didn’t respond. She only started shaking more. 

“Talk to me...” I begged with tears in my eyes. 

After a moment, she pulled her knees to her chest and curled herself into a ball, coming to rest closer to my chest on her side. I waited for her to adjust and put my arms around her again. She was shaking violently now.  

“2B?”  

“No more...” she whispered. 

“No more what? What’s wrong?” 

“No...no more...please,” she whispered again.  

“2B?” I muttered, stroking her hair. 

“No...no no no no...no more...no more...no more...please, no more...please...no...” she whimpered.

My heart sunk as she shivered in my arms. “2B? Talk to me, what’s in your mind, I need to know,” I held her closer, trying to comfort her. 

“No more, no more, no more, no...no...no more, please no more........Nines......no.....”

“2B...”  

“No more...please no more...please...” 

She wasn’t even listening.... she wasn’t here. She was trapped inside her own mind. I only had one option left. I sighed and kissed the top of her head, “2B, I know you're in there. I’m going to try to help you. But, I’m going to have to hack in, okay? You know I'd ask for permission, but right now, this is necessary. You've been strong for me for so long. It's my turn to be strong and fight for you. Please, forgive me...I’m going in.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if the formatting looks a bit weird. It kept getting fucked up, but I think I fixed it now. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter!


	3. Crumbling Walls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should write soap operas...
> 
> Hey also, Warning:  
> there's an almost-sex scene towards the end, so when it comes watch out for these "■■■■■" that's how you'll know where it starts and where it ends so you can skip it if you want. Although, not much happens really, and it's got more significance than just that. 
> 
> Anyway, enjoy!

It was like being in the eye of a hurricane. Everything around me was a chaos of randomized data, static, and noise. The usual pristine white of the hacking region wasn’t even visible anymore. I could barely focus on one thing.

“Alright 2B, let’s get you out of this mess,” I took a deep breath and stepped forward.

Her personality data was nearly impenetrable. The entire region was riddled with black vine thorns. I tried to use my best hacking tactics, but none of them were working so far, so then I foolishly ventured in and tried to remove the vines manually, but the firewall was too powerful and I stumbled back as a shockwave wracked through my entire body and I yelped in pain. I tried hacking again, with no avail. 

“2B,” I panted, catching my breath, “I’m going to get to you, no matter what,” I said as I stood up again and fought my way through the thorns, bombarding them with attacks of my own. The process was painfully slow. It felt like hours had passed before I finally managed to reduce their number, slashing through them and carving a path inside, fighting against the searing pain of the few that managed to pierce my own data. 

“Just a few more...Agh!” I yelled as one particular thorn cut into my side, sending yet another shockwave through me. The pain only made me fight harder as I slashed through the last of them in my path. “I’m in!”

It didn’t look any better from here. The inside of her personality data looked like a crumbling building, similar to the ones in the city ruins. The once pristine white walls were all cracked and filled with dark holes. It was hard to see through the foggy atmosphere. It was so cold... not in the way that snow is cold, but in the way that it made me feel inside, like my entire skeleton was aching, my pulse rate and my black box turning to ice.

“It’s alright, 2B...I’m here. I’m going to fix this,” I grunted and fought against the pain as I ran a full scan. 

All her bodily and motor functions seemed to be in order, but her psychological state was critical. There were severe abnormalities in her synaptic patterns and HPA axis, which explained her extremely high levels of stress, overactive fear response, and the over-consolidation of fragmented memories floating around in every direction. They were all twisted, torn and stitched back up in grotesque ways with thorns protruding out of every single one. There were so many. I had trouble focusing until one such fragment invaded my line of vision. 

 

Footsteps echo throughout a dark, wide room. My own voice speaks with excitement.

_"I'm gonna see if I can open this. Though it'll probably be impossible ..."_

Two large doors creak open. 

_"Wait a sec, it seriously worked?!"_

It was that place we were in today...but this memory wasn’t from today. My suspicions from earlier had been right. We had been to that place before. I moved to touch the memory but was immediately pierced by a shockwave of excruciating pain. I didn’t let go, however. I needed to know...

_"Alert: Extreme differences in elevation between the door and passageway. There is a possibility of it hindering movement."_

_"I'm just gonna take a quick look! I'll be right back!"_

A swift flash of a silver sword. Precise. Quick. Cold. 

A single pathetic whimper.

 _“...So...it...was true...2B...no...2E...”_ a single sigh of defeat. A dead body hits the ground with a loud thud. The skull cracks on the stairs. Blood spatters in all directions. Blood drips from the sword onto his torn, black clothes. Blood pools everywhere. 

 _“Black box signal confirmed offline.”_  153’s monotonous voice breaks the silence.

 _“...Nines...”_  A shaky sigh follows. _“...Nines...NINES!”_  She drops the sword, letting it clash down the stairs, and crouches down to touch the face of a hollow body. My body. She puts her arms around it and cradles it, smearing her own clothes and face in red, and breaks down sobbing uncontrollably. 

 _“Goodbye, 2B,”_  it sounds like an echo. There was no visual data, so I assumed it was a different memory that had become intermingled with this one.

 

Another shockwave wracked through me and another whirlwind of memories came into my line of vision. 

She thrusts her sword downward.

 _“Destruction of head,”_  there is a slight hesitation. 

 _“Goodbye, 2B,”_  my voice echoes in her mind.

 _“Destruction of chest,”_  she thrusts her sword down again. 

 _“Goodbye, 2B...”_  Her hand shakes slightly.

_“Black box signal confirmed offline.”_

_“Goodbye, 2B...”_  it goes on and on, over and over and over. 

_“I won’t apologize...”_

 

_You are ordered to terminate 9S._

I’m staring up at the large structure in the desert. 

 _“Huh...so, this structure is known as a temple, some sort of religious facility. Its formal name was the ‘Barren Temple,’ or something like that. It started out as a place of residence, but apparently humans later began using it as a temple instead!"_  I smile and wave for her to follow. _"Come on, let's go, 2B!”_  I start making my way in, but before I can step one foot into the temple, her sword runs through my chest. I...He cries out and gasps her name. 

 _“W-why...”_ he whimpers, and after a few seconds, he’s gone. 

_“Black box signal confirmed offline.”_

She pulls out the sword immediately and catches the body in her arms. She stands there for a moment, just holding it close. Tears blur her vision. After a while, her knees give in and she crumbles to the ground. 

 _“I’m sorry...”_  she holds him closer and kisses my forehead.  _His_  forehead. _“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry...Nines...”_

She closes her eyes, but her cries still ring in my ears. 

 

There were more fatal memories. So. Many. More. All going haywire. They attacked from all directions, and all I could do was take the hit. I wasn’t about to damage them any further than they already were. All at once, they consumed me.

 

The sound of rushing desert wind.

_...has attempted illegal access to the main server multiple times. We found traces of him having accessed the most confidential layer in the past few days._

_Therefore, you are ordered to terminate 9S._

An excited voice rambles about Old World discoveries. _“Say, 2B, what do you think this is?”_ My voice. Echoes of lighthearted laughter bounce on the walls of a large chamber.

_I’m sorry..._

A silver sword flashes.

_“Stop! 2B! Let me explain!”_

Swords clash against each other. 

_...attempted illegal access_

_main server_

_traces of him_

_accessed confidential layer_

_past few days._

_Therefore..._

A pained cry.  _“2...B...why...”_

 _“You...attempted to access confidential data from the main server...I’m only following orders...”_  her voice breaks.

 _“But...2B...just...ah...trust me...please,”_  he whimpers. Tears roll down his face. My face?

Her vision blurs as she thrusts her sword deeper into his chest. He cries out and pleads to her, reaching out to her with his trembling hand. 

_“Black box signal confirmed offline.”_

His body lays before her. She kneels wordlessly. Clutches his bloodied coat. Her hands shake. She lets out an earth shattering cry. 

 

        _illegal access_

_traces_

_confidential_

_terminate 9S._

She walks beside me, watching every movement carefully. She listens to me ramble all the way to the temple. 

 _“Hey 2B, check this place out!”_  Running footsteps echo through a wide hall. A smile tugs at the edge of her lips but...

_“Emotions are...”_

_...you are ordered to terminate 9S._

Blood spatters.

_“Black box signal confirmed offline.”_

 

_...Ordered to terminate 9S._

_“2B...I..love...y...”_

Blood gushes out of a large wound.

_“Black box signal confirmed offline.”_

 

_...terminate 9S._

_“2B...”_

_“Black box signal confirmed offline.”_

 

_Terminate 9S._

_“NO MORE! No more...please, no more...no...no...no more no more no more...no...no more....please, no more...Nines...”_  she curls up right there on the floor beside him and cries until there aren’t any more tears left to cry. 

The sound of the rushing desert wind turns to static.

 

I stumbled out of the flurry of memories being hurled my way and lied down, panting heavily. My entire being was aching, as if I had been hit by lighting. Alarms went off in my own head as all these newfound memories spun around me. 

That was barely a fraction of them. These were just the ones at the front of her mind at the moment. Of course...the temple...it must have caused her to flashback into those moments.

“2B, why didn’t you tell me?” I sighed. “We could’ve gotten out of there sooner, you know I wouldn’t have cared. All I care about is  _you_ ,” I closed my eyes as I tried to pull myself back together and dove into her HPA axis to try to bring her stress levels down to normal. 

For that I had to input a series of codes that would simulate an SRI and a sedative effect. It wouldn’t last very long, but it would be enough for her to at least feel better until I could get my hands on real medication. It took a few minutes, but I got it done. That should’ve made the overactivity of memories decrease. They were still swarming all over the place, but they were slowing down bit by bit. Jumping into action once again, I carefully installed a healing program that would help clean out the thorns. It was a complicated process, but once it was in effect, it would hopefully reduce her pain by at least 30%. There was only so much I could do. The rest was all up to her...I hated feeling so useless. If it were up to me, I would have fixed all of her, completely, 100%. I would have saved her like a prince from a movie and woken her up with a kiss to delete her curse. I would’ve fought a thousand dragon-sized viruses for her to live happily with me. But our reality was a bit different. 

I finally exited her hacking space and let out a long, shaky sigh. The images of what I saw were still searing in my head, but I had to focus. I had to help her. She was still curled up in my arms. Her shaking had stopped. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing evenly now.

“2B,” I whispered as I pulled down my visor, letting it fall around my neck. 

Her eyelids slowly fluttered open and she looked into my eyes.

“Hey,” I smiled gently and stroked her soft, damp hair.

“Hey,” she whispered back.

“How do you feel?” 

“...sleepy,” she sighed and nestled closer to my chest. 

I grinned. “That’s alright, you can sleep. I installed a couple of temporary programs into your data. They’re gonna help you out, but one of them will make you sleepy for a while. So, just rest for now, okay? I’ll take care of you. I promise,” I leaned my head down and kissed her forehead. 

She hummed softly in response and closed her eyes again.

I smiled softly. “Sweet dreams, Baby,” I whispered.

Her eyes snapped open. “What did you just call me?”

“Hehe, Baby?” I gave her a sheepish grin.

“I’m not a child...” she said, furrowing her brow slightly in confusion.

I snickered. “No, I didn’t mean it that way, it’s just that, humans also used that word as an affectionate term for their significant others. I thought it would be, uh, cute? I-if you don’t like it, it’s fine, I won’t call you that.”

She blushed and smiled softly. “No, it’s fine. I like it. It’s...nice.”

My smile widened a bit, “Yeah,” I leaned down and met her lips halfway. “Baby,” I grinned. 

She blushed harder and wrapped her arms around my neck, snuggling closer and hiding her face in the crook of my neck. 

I chuckled. “Alright then. You should sleep now, you need rest to recover,” I wrapped my arms a bit tighter around her. 

“Shouldn’t we get back to camp first?” She muttered, yawning. 

“I’ll carry you,” I said simply.

“What? No way, let me get up,” she tried to move out of my embrace, but I held her closer and slowly stood up with her in my arms.

“What, you don’t think I’m strong enough?” I teased.

“Nines, please,” she sighed in protest, with her eyes already half closed.

“I got you, don’t worry. It’s not far from here, I can handle it,” I gave her a reassuring smile.

She starred at me with droopy eyes for a moment as I started walking. “Fine,” she sighed, finally closing her eyes, nestling herself closer, and wrapping her arms around my neck once again. In less than a minute, she was asleep. 

 

I had to stop to rest like five times. Thankfully, she was asleep through it all, otherwise it would’ve been embarrassing if she saw me struggling so much. Of course, I could’ve had 042 carry her instead and we would have gotten to camp much faster, but I just...I liked this feeling. It was nice to be able to do this for her, as insignificant as it was.

As soon as we got to the Resistance Camp, I took her into our room and laid her down on our bed. I carefully slipped off her boots and sandy stockings, then dusted her legs off a bit with a small towel. Once I was sure she was well settled in, I turned on our new fan on my way out so her damp clothes would dry faster and she wouldn’t be uncomfortable. I quickly stepped out to hand Anemone the stuff she wanted, explained a little bit of what happened to 2B back in the desert without giving her too many details, and requested for her to not give us any more missions in that specific area. She took it better than I thought she would, she was actually very understanding. Apparently, 2B’s symptoms were very common among the resistance members as well, so she agreed to my request without any questions and also handed me some special medication that could help her. I thanked her and went back into the room. I put our pods in sleep mode and crawled into bed beside her after kicking off my boots and stripping down to just my shorts and undershirt. Laying on my side, I watched her sleep, feeling her warm breath on my face and watching the subtle rise and fall of her chest. I shuffled closer to her and put my hand on top of hers, then closed my eyes. Even through my exhaustion, I couldn’t shut down properly. My mind wouldn’t stop racing with all sorts of dark thoughts, filled with doubt and fear. 

_Why do you insist on suffering alone?_

_Why can’t you tell me the truth?_

_Why do you keep hiding yourself from me, even now?_

_Why don’t you trust me?_

_Am I not good enough? The others you slaughtered... were they better than me?_

_Are you upset that I’m not like them? Am I so different?_

_Is it stupid...that I envy them?_

_It’s not fair..._

_She is mine. Only mine. It’s not fair that they got to know her before me._

_It’s not fair that they had shared those moments with her. Moments I will never know about. Memories that I’ll never have. Memories that should have been mine to keep._

_She’s mine. All mine. And by default...shouldn’t her memories be mine too? Her past, her bliss, her pain. Her lies. Her truths. All of her. She’s mine, and mine alone._

_No...maybe she’s not. Maybe...she just sees someone else through my eyes. Maybe she doesn’t love ME. She just loves a past version of me. Maybe that’s her secret, and she doesn’t want me to see what she shared with the others. If that’s the case, then I... Were they even me? Were we the same? I’ve never really thought much about the old human belief known as “reincarnation.” Until now. What if a part of me was still the same, even after all my memory was gone? Even through reset after reset after reset? Would that still be me...?_

_What was she like before? When did we first meet? For real? What was our story really like? Did I love her just as much back then, as I do now? Did she love me? Did we ever...?_

_I reach out to her, but she’s not there._

_Suddenly, there are so many of her all around me. And yet...none of them is HER. She’s gone. Gone. Gone. Dead. She lies bleeding before me. Just her._

_2B..._

_No. It can’t be... She’s mine. Don’t take her away from me! She’s mine! She’s MINE! SHE’S MINE! SHE’S MINE! SHE-_

“Nines?” I jolted awake at the touch of her hand stroking my cheek gently, much like cold water splashing my face. “What’s wrong?” Her eyes searched mine for an answer. 

I stared back at her, trying to regulate my breathing. “Nothing. Why?” 

“You were whining in your sleep, you looked like you were in pain. Were you having a bad dream?” She furrowed her brow in concern. 

“N-no, I uh, sorry, d-did I wake you?” I stuttered, avoiding the question.

She shook her head. “I had just woken up,” she moved her hand up and caressed my hair. “You said my name. Why?”

I gasped softly. _Shit._ “I... w-well, uh, I...um...” I looked away in shame. I couldn’t tell her. I couldn’t tell her about the dreams, about what had happened when she was gone, or all the monstrous things I did, and all the repulsive, twisted thoughts that took over me. Specially the ones about her. She would hate me...

“Nines,” she whispered, planting a soft kiss on my forehead before pressing hers against mine. “I’m. I’m sorry about today,” she muttered, looking away, “I didn’t mean to react that way, I...I don’t know what came over me, it’s never happened before...not like that. It just happened and I don’t know why exactly but suddenly I just lost all control and I’m so sorry I-” 

“2B, please, don’t,” I sighed, reaching out to stroke her hair. “You have nothing to apologize for. I should’ve known something was wrong the moment your behavior changed. I was just so curious about that stupid place and I just didn’t know...” I fought to swallow a growing lump in my throat. Her cries and desperate pleas echoed in my mind. “2B...if. If we ever go somewhere else like that, and the memories of that place cause you pain. Please, promise you’ll tell me, and we’ll get out as soon as possible. I won’t complain. I just want you to be alright, that’s all I really want. Will you promise that?”

She hesitated. “I promise,” she muttered. 

I sighed and pecked her lips. “Thank you.”

She frowned slightly. “Did your dream have anything to do with that?” She asked, looking up again.

I clenched my jaw, looking away. “No...not exactly,”

“What were you dreaming about?”

I went silent and chewed on the inside of my cheek.

“Nines?” 

I shook my head. “I’d rather not talk about it.”

“But if it was about me-”

“I just don’t want to.”

“Nines...You’re never like this, what’s on your mind? Please, tell me what’s wr-”

“And how would that be fair?” I snapped, sitting up. “You expect me to just spill everything out, while you keep yourself guarded all the time, _even now_. From everyone. _From me_. You wake up crying night after night, and you never tell me why. You never let me in. I have absolutely no memory of an entire portion of our lives together. All those precious moments? All those memories? GONE. I don’t even know who I was. I don’t even know who you were. All my life has been a blatant LIE and every time I discovered the truth, they would send _you_ to do the dirty job. I don’t even know _what or who_ I am anymore, and sometimes I feel like I don’t even know _you_! And you just expect me to be okay with all that?” My voice gradually broke as tears welled up in my eyes and I didn’t realize I was raising my voice until she flinched back and covered her ears. I gasped at her reaction and retracted slightly. A few seconds of silence felt like a millennia. “2B...” I whispered. 

She looked back at me as if I had slapped her. Her lips quivered as she opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. ‘I’m sorry’ she mouthed, before sitting up and scrambling out of bed, heading for the door. 

_No no no no no no no..._

“2B, wait!” I rolled out and ran after her. I latched onto her, wrapping my arms around her waist tightly from behind. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please stay here. Please. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to lash out like that, I’m sorry, 2B, I’m sorry. I love you. I love you so much, I’m sorry, I'm so sorry,” I cried, finally allowing those pesky tears to flow.  _Why do I keep hurting her? Why? I just want her to be happy...if I can’t even do that, I..._

She sniffled, hugging my arms with her own. We stayed like that for a moment, until we regained some composure. I let go of her and pulled on her shoulder gently, beckoning her to turn around. She obliged, but kept looking at the floor. I reached out slowly and wiped her tears with my thumbs. 

“I’m really sorry. I don’t want to hurt you 2B. I love you. More than anything,” I put my hands on her shoulders for support as I raised on my tiptoes slightly and kissed her cheek before pressing my forehead to hers. “Please forget what I said, you don’t have to tell me anything you’re not ready to share. It’s okay. We have all the time in the world now, there’s no hurry for anything. And even if you don’t want me to know some things...I’ll understand. My number one priority is you, and I want you to be alright, first and foremost. So please, don’t feel bad, okay?”

She simply closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around my waist tenderly. “I’ll show you everything,” she whispered after a moment. 

“Wait. What?” 

“Every single memory. All of it,” she muttered in a small voice, opening her eyes and looking straight into mine.

“No...2B. I know what I said, but I was thinking selfishly. If there are things you don’t want me to see, that’s fine. I understand. I want to respect your boundaries too...” 

“I don’t want them,” she muttered.

“Huh?”

“I don’t want boundaries. I don’t want to feel like there’s a giant, thick wall between us anymore. So I’m going to tear it down, until nothing is left of it. If you must know just how horrible I’ve been...and all of the atrocities I have caused...then so be it. Just. Please...don’t hate me...” she finished in a whisper as a few tears rolled down her cheek.

I quickly raised my hand to wipe them off tenderly. “2B, I could never ever  _ever_  hate you. You _know_  I know what your real designation was.  _I. don’t. care_. It’s all in the past now. Even after watching those few memories from the temple, I-”

“You what?” Her eyes widened in alarm. 

 _Oh, yeah...I wasn’t supposed to do that_. I bit my lower lip. “I...when I hacked into you during your memory overdrive episode, I...I kind of had no option. They kept coming from all directions, so...”

“How much did you see?” She asked urgently, tightening her grip on me. 

“I wouldn’t know exactly, they were all mixed and mashed together, so it was hard to tell which was which,” I confessed, bowing down my head, “I’m sorry...I know it was wrong, but I was so worried about you and I needed to help you out,” I looked up again with an apologetic look. 

Her eyes were wide, but she didn’t look upset. She looked...terrified.

“2B?”

“Did...did you see...” she whispered. She looked at me with teary eyes, and I knew what she meant to ask.

I nodded slowly and squeezed her shoulder reassuringly. “B-but it’s alright, see? I didn’t run away screaming, nor am I going to anytime soon,” I teased, trying to lighten her mood. In all truth, I had been shaken to the core, but I wasn’t about to tell her that. 

A river of tears streamed down her cheeks, but she didn’t make a sound. She just froze there, trembling like a scared kitten.

I cupped her face with my hands and wiped her pearly tears away as best as I could. “2B, it’s okay, I don’t blame you for anything. _Anything_  at all,” I pressed my forehead to hers, “I still have you here with me. That’s all that matters. It’s alright, come here,” I pulled her into a strong embrace and held her head close as she cried into the crook of my neck. Her broken sobs ripped through her whole body as she trembled and silently begged for forgiveness. I kissed her tears away and reminded her that she didn’t have to keep apologizing, because I forgave her the moment we met. Tears spilled out of my own eyes as I held her tight. 

In that very moment, I wanted to shout. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs and somehow go back in time and undo every bad thing that had ever happened to us. I thirsted for the blood of whichever god had cursed us to live and die relentlessly through this hell. I cursed the heavens, I cursed hell, I cursed androids, the aliens, the machines, and even the humans for this pain. This pain we could never quite get rid of. The pain of a thousand battles. The pain of every wound. The pain of losing each other again and again. I wanted to tear everything apart. I wanted to scream. I wanted to break down. But I held her tightly and cried silently instead. I stayed strong for her, just as she had stayed strong for me all throughout these years. 

Once our tears had ceased, I guided her back to our bed and we just laid there, holding each other in peaceful silence until I spoke again.

“Baby,” was the first word I uttered. Softly, in her ear, like a secret. For me, it was another way I had found to say ‘I love you.’ Humans had used it a lot in love songs when referring to their loved one, that’s how I discovered the use of the word as an affectionate term. So I thought I should use it too, and give it a meaning of my own.

Her lips quirked into a tiny smile. “You’re the baby.”

“How come?” I smiled.

“I’m older than you,” she said as she raked her fingers through my hair.

“Only by a few weeks,” I pointed out.

“Still,” she pecked the tip of my nose, “you’re a baby. Because you’re cute and cuddly,” she said, rubbing her nose with mine. “And small.”

“Oh, c’mooon, we’re basically the same size,” I protested.

“One inch is still one inch.”

I glared playfully, “I could ask for a height extension.”

“No, I like you this way,” she snuggled closer.

I sighed, “Fine,” I stroked her cheek, “but the name ‘Baby’ still suits you better.”

She grinned softly as her cheeks turned a light shade of pink. She leaned in and closed the small gap between our lips. I kissed her back lovingly, breathing in her sweet scent.

“I love you, Nines,” she whispered when she pulled back. 

“I love you, too,” I grinned as I kissed her once again, “Baby.”

She snickered. “So, is that like my new name now?”

“Well, not exactly. Just a cute nickname. I thought, since I already have one, then you might want one too,” I explained. “You see, I did a little research on human relationships, and I found a wide variety of affectionate terms they used on one another, but the word “Baby” was one of the most prominent ones. There were others though, like darling, sweetheart, honey, love, among others. But I specially liked this one for you. It’s endearing, don’t you think? Plus, I think it suits you since it kind of sounds like BB. Get it? Two letter Bs? 2B?” I winked.

“I see,” she chuckled. “Clever.”

“Thank you,” I grinned and kissed her lips softly, over and over, as if trying to heal her with them.

She kissed me back and I smiled through each kiss, until I pulled back.

“Baby?”

She stifled a giggle, “Yeah?” 

I hesitated, watching her expression. The pain in her eyes had subsided, but there was still something hidden in them. “I...I just want you to know. Even though we’ve both done things we regret, and things we can’t undo...I just want you to know, I’ll always love you, no matter what. I mean it.”

She stared at me looking a bit dumbfounded, and without saying a word, she pulled me back in and locked her lips with mine. I wholly welcomed her warm, soft lips as I kissed her back. Without separating her lips from mine, she shuffled closer and gently pushed me to lie on my back as she moved to lie on top of me, pressing her body entirely against mine. A soft moan escaped my lips as she deepened our kiss, and then abruptly stopped.

I gasped at the sudden halt. “2Beee,” I protested.

She looked at me with a pensive look on her face. “Sorry, I just. Can I try something?”

I nodded, “Of course. Anything.”

■■■■■

She slowly leaned down to kiss my lips once again and then pulled back to kiss my forehead. Her hands roamed on my shoulders and sides as she moved lower down and planted kisses up and down my whole neck, taking her time and being thorough. I gasped at the ticklish feeling of her lips on my skin and reveled in each sensation. I moved my hands up to the opening on her back and caressed her soft, fair skin. Moving further down, she pushed my shirt up to reveal my chest and leaned down to place the most tender kiss right in the middle of it, right above my black box encasement. She kissed that spot again and again, and then let her lips linger there for a moment before moving further down to my belly, peppering it with kisses all over. 

“Turn around,” she whispered. I obliged without hesitation and lied on my belly. 

She continued her loving ministrations with one firm kiss in the middle of my upper back, where she kissed over and over -just like she did on my chest- as her hands caressed all the rest of my exposed skin. As she did this, I began to understand what she was doing. It had no real logic, for there was no scientific proof of kisses having any healing properties. Still, I had done the same to her so many times. It just...felt nice. I gasped her name and bunched up the sheets in my fists. Her lips and her gentle caresses were absolutely maddening. All my built up anger and doubt washed away with her light touches, leaving me a panting, gasping mess. After a moment, she started trailing kisses all the way down to my lower back and then up again, being as meticulous as possible. Once she was done there, she flipped me around once again and trailed kisses all over my arms, from my shoulders all the way down to my hands. While she was busy with one hand, I caressed her face and hair with the other. Moving lower down to my legs, she caressed them tenderly and continued trailing kisses all over, starting from my thighs, stopping at my knee for a second, continuing all the way down to my feet, and back up again. 

My breath came in shaky pants and soft moans as she came closer and closer to my hips, pushing my shorts as far up as she could. Just the sound of her warm, wet lips against my skin were enough to drive me insane. She reached my inner thigh and I lost it. My pulse rang in my ears as my inner temperature rose, making me feel warm all over. I held on to the sheets for dear life as she took over my entire mind and body with just these simple, feathery, light touches, without even having to go any further than that. I felt a sudden shock of electricity run through my entire body, and I couldn't stop myself from crying out. Not from pain, but from the overwhelming sensations she made me feel. It was like an E-drug overdose.  

■■■■■

All too soon, it was over. She moved back up and we were once again face to face. She gave me a final, gentle kiss on the lips. She looked deeply into my eyes, as if trying to tell me something urgent. I looked into hers with wonder, admiration, and insatiable curiosity. 

“Nines,” she said, just above a whisper.

“Y-yeah?” 

“I...” she bit her lip and looked away for a moment. “About what I said before...I mean it.”

I furrowed my brows in confusion. “What?”

“You’re right...I can’t keep hiding forever. Specially from you, and even though it’s a risk, I can’t keep hiding all the truth. And I need to somehow give back at least a portion of all that I’ve taken from you. It’s the least I can do. So...I’ll show you everything,” she looked back at me with determination in her eyes.

I reached out and brushed her hair away from her face, placing the few strands behind her ear. “Are you sure about this? I don’t want you to suffer because of me. I know how much pain they cause you. Really, I’ll be fine without-”

“I need you to have them. These memories shouldn’t be just mine, they’re _ours_  and if I can’t at least do this much for you, I feel like that giant wall will never break and that distance between us will never close. So, please. Accept them. You want them too, don’t you?” She clutched my shoulders tightly.

Her voice was on the verge of breaking, so I pulled her closer, wrapping my arms around her protectively. “Shhh, breathe, breathe slowly,” I whispered and took a deep breath for her to mimic me. I exhaled with her and kissed her forehead. “Of course I want them. But only if you’re sure about this, and only if you’re ready to open up like that. Otherwise, I’d rather not push you. Okay?”

She nodded. “I’m sure about this...I could show you my favorite ones first, if you’d like. Or we could start at the beginning. What do you say?” 

I thought about it for a moment. “Hmm...how about you choose? You’d know better than me, anyway, so I’ll let you surprise me,” I smiled.

“Alright,” she smiled back, and I couldn’t help but kiss her again.

“Do it,” she said after pulling back. 

“Okay,” I took a deep breath and stroked her face. “Hacking in.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, I hope you liked this long ass intro to the rest of this series.
> 
> Anyway, I was thinking it'd be fun if you guys sent me prompts for the next chapters. They're all gonna be about 2B's memories with 9S. If you want, you can comment here with your prompt, or send it to my tumblr @xanderbot13. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!  
> (Also idk why the A/N from the first chapter keeps appearing below, so asdfkjhkl just ignore it)

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked this first chapter, please leave a comment if you did! I’d appreciate your feedback very much :)


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